I’ve caught my husband, on more than one occasion, complaining to his friends about the “Great Wall” of pillows in our bed at night. Then he bemoans how he gets a sour look if he dares try to move one or <gasp> take one. This generally leads to a rant by the other guys about their massive pillow woes. I admit, most of the women I know are crazy about pillows in one way or another. But why?

Instead of giving you the standard response of “I need/want/like them,” I’ll clue you in to a few reasons why lots of people border on a pillow fetish. (Yes, I’ve found a guy here and there with the same love for pillows…so it’s not just a female hang up!)

On the surface, part of our pillow problem is thanks to all the style magazines and websites that show us how a “proper” bedroom or living area should look. They generally have so many pillows on the furniture that only a Smurf could exist alongside all the pillows heaped on chairs, sofas, and beds. Despite our recognition that this is ridiculous, we still take away the idea that pillows finish the look.

We also have a subconscious desire to be surrounded or protected, and pillows can easily fit this psychological need. Of course, this is really the adult version of a child’s teddy bear. In our youth, scary thoughts or dreams were vanquished by squeezing whatever lovey you had in the bed. An adult would really get grief for a stuffed animal in the bed; a pillow brings the same sense of security without the stigma. While snuggling up to your spouse certainly meets this need, a pillow is a good alternative if that person is out of town or just doesn’t want to be disturbed while sleeping.

Before you get frustrated and start tossing out pillows, there are some great physiological needs for pillows (beyond the accepted one or two for sleeping). Multiple pillows stacked up on the bed can really help with breathing when you have a cold or an issue with snoring. If you’re pregnant, a pillow under that growing belly can relieve some of the weight. For those suffering from back problems, a pillow under the legs or behind the back can really provide relief. And, outside of the bedroom, throw pillows can really help shorter people sit comfortably (providing back support while also being able to bend your legs).

There you go…some ridiculous reasons and some legitimate reasons for keeping a bunch of pillows around. Still think it’s completely absurd? At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if you think a pillow-laden house is a dream come true or a nightmare. If you live in a house with a pillow lover, you’ll just need to get used to them…they’re there to stay!